No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
