You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
My bed smells like the plague
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