Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize