Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
