I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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