Just mADE A PArabola og urine
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
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