I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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