How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Redeem this text for a blowjob
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
