that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Two words: nipple clamps
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