I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
