I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
