they said they heard you say put it in my butt
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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