Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
