Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
