doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Randomize