let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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