I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
