Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
