absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
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