There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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