On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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