how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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