We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
