Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
