so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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