Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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