I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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