I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
