Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Randomize