I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
