Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize