My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
