i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
