You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
