Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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