i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize