I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Porn is love you can see.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Randomize