Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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