And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
