I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
