I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
is it fun? or sober?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
