Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
