I am puke
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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