He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
