I wannas sexs uuuuu
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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