remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
