i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
