We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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