he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
