I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
