you would pick up someone in the library
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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