What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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